Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize