That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
My nipple is on Facebook.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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