You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
