My nipple is on Facebook.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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