I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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