sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
