the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
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