it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize