Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
