She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
