dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize