im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Fuck appropriateness.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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