i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
We are two peas in an std pod
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize
