How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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