R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize