I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Duck Duck Cougar?
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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