toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
