Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
