Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..