i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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