R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
