I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
