Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
