Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
