Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize