dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
