What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize