In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
