She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
