just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
