with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
