Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
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the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
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He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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