I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
