is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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