wanna go halves on a baby?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
