Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
My breasts were aching with rage.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
