what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize