Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
