Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
