I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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