while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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