Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
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It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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