oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize