An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
