clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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