Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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