just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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