I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
