I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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