i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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