I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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